Clue
by Kuriso-Kun
Summary: It's not just a board game anymore. Pegasus invites everyone over for a dinner party. But the party turns to murder when secrets are revealed. Was it Kaiba in the lounge with the knife? or Yami in the study with the rope? Romantic pairings yxyy sxj
1. The Suspects

Kuriso- I was watching the movie and thought how funny it would be to turn this into a story. So here goes nothing. As usual I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh! Or Clue.

It was a dark and stormy night….no really I'm serious. Would I lie to you? I realize that is a cliché but how else do you describe it when the sun has gone down and it is pouring outside?

From the distance a black car could be seen driving up through the rain. The car's destination was the mansion on top of the hill. It was a drive the car had made hundreds of times before, yet this time, there was a purpose behind it. As it crept up to the rusted gates, they opened welcoming the car up to the front door. The driver looked at the house just as a flash of lightning lit up the sky. He took in a deep breath and continued his climb to the front door. The driver parked just to the left of the main entrance, shut the car off and opened the car door. As he stood, he brushed his long grey hair out of one eye, keeping the other hidden. He pulled out his umbrella, grabbed his coat from the back seat and made his way to the large double doors.

As he stepped up the first few steps, he was greeted by two guard dogs on chains. Baring their teeth and barking, they lunged at him. But the gentleman in black knew they were there. Take a few steps to the side he let grab his jacket as though he were a bullfighter. From the brown sack he held in his hand, he threw two raw steaks. This caught he dog's attention where they followed the aroma of the dead animal and began enjoying their feast. The gentleman again sighed and brushed his long hair, picking up his jacket, he proceeded to the white magnificent double doors. Opening the door, he noticed a foul smell. Looking under his shoe, and then glaring back at the dogs in disgust, he scrapped the remains of the present the canines left him on the bricks outside and walked in.

He hung his jacket up on the rack to the left of the door and heard music playing in the distance. Walking towards the room where it was coming from he entered and saw a brunet woman in a French maid's outfit wiping dust off the crystal wine glasses and bouncing lightly to the rhythm of the music.

"Ehmm.." the gentleman cleared his throat to get her attention. "Is everything ready?"

"Yes Mr. Pegasus," she responded quickly.

"And you have you….instructions?"

"Yes."

"Good. Our guests shall be arriving any moment." As he said this, he walked out of the library and headed towards the kitchen. He walked towards a very large Cantonese woman sharpening a knife.

"Ah…" before he was allowed to speak she turned around with the knife pointed at his face.

"Dinner will be ready at 7," she said firmly before returning to sharpening her knife.

"Um….er ah…thank you," walking out quickly wanting to be no where near her. Upon leaving the kitchen, the doorbell rang for what was sure to be the first time of many throughout the process of the evening.

On the outside of the door stood a tall blonde man. He was brown eyed and dressed in a fitted mustard colored suit with a brown coat and hat. He stood their nervous still not completely sure of his reasoning for his appearance that evening. Staring at the grand doors he noticed a foul smell. Deciding to check his shoes, he was stopped when the door opened and he was greeted with a rather startling surprise.

"PEGASUS?!" he nearly shouted. "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?"

"Ah, good to see you Joseph Wheeler. Do come in you are expected."

"I ain't going anywhere you are! What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be locked up in yo castle or sumthin?"

"Always the polite one aren't we? Think of me as a party planner. You do know how I love these little get together. Please don't stand outside. You will catch a death of cold and I don't want to be standing at the door all night letting the cold winds in." Joey was cold, so rather than argue anymore he followed Pegasus in still unsure of why he of all people was there. Maybe he was up to something again. He would warn the other guests of this psycho, but once he was inside it seemed there were no other guests. He must have been the first there. Following Pegasus he entered the library where the attractive maid was waiting to offer him a glass of Champaign.

"Ah Yvette. I would like you to meet Mr. Joseph Wheeler. You may know him by the nick name the papers have given him "Cornel Mustard," for his military tactics in dueling.

"How do you do, sir? Care for a drink?" Not wanting to be rude, he gladly accepted the drink. He was about to ask again why Pegasus was here when he was interrupted by the doorbell.

"Excuse me." Pegasus exited the room and went to the front door. He opened it to reveal and lovely Egyptian woman standing at the door in an all black coat and a black veil as though a widow at a funeral in mourning.

"Ishizu. Such a pleasure to see you."

"Pegasus? Is this some sort of trick," she glared suspiciously.

"I feel I am going to be getting that all night. No no, please follow me. May I take your coat?" She opens her coat revealing a blinding white lining. Handing it to Pegasus, he hangs it next to the others and proceeds to lead her into the library.

"I am sure you know Joseph. And this is Yvette. Yvette, this is Ishizu White, I believe is your new last name after your recent marriage is it not?" Ishizu grabbed the glass of wine from Yvette's hand firmly and turned away.

"So I take it you two have met?" Joey asked.

"You could say that." Ishizu remarked coldly. At the front door, a knock was heard. Pegasus walked to the door and opened it. There stood a tall brunet with piercing blue eyes in a royal blue suit and dark green coat.

"Kaiba-Boy! So glad you could join our little party."

"Hm…Pegasus…I knew it was a matter of time before you would become the butler to someone else."

"Tsk tsk Kaiba-boy. We don't need any mean words tonight. I am not the butler. Just think of it as me helping a friend."

"You've never helped anyone before in your life. Why start now?"

"Such the vicious tongue we have. Please do follow me. We are waiting for you."

"Who is we?"

"Patcience is a virtue Kaiba-boy. All shall be explained soon enough."

"Yeah, and time is money."

"Oh Mr. Green, is that all you think about? Money money money! What about a relaxing evening with friends."

"Hmph…" He followed Pegasus into the library. "Great, we have the black widow, a mut, and a maid. Some evening with friends alright."

"Great to see you too Kaiba!" Joey snapped back. He always seemed to be the only one who had a comment for just about everything Kaiba could throw at him. If you didn't know them, one may suspect there could be something between the two of them.

"Allow me to present Professor Yami and Ms. Mai Valentine." Yami stood with his hair in its usual tri colored gravity defying manner, though he now donned a pair of thin frameless glasses in a deep purple suit that hugged him just right so that he kept the thinned body look. Mai was dressed in a scarlet gown with a slit up to her upper thigh. She had long black gloves and stilettos making her already impressive legs seem longer.

"So you were dragged into this too Yami," said Joey.

"It would appear so. I did not know you also would be attending." Yami responded.

"And last but not least," Pegasus interrupted, "Mrs. Tea Peacock." She entered in a blue evening gown with a fur stole. Her hair was longer but up in a bun with a feathered hat holding it up.

"Hey guys. What are you all doing here."

"Your guess is as good as mine," said Kaiba. He walked next to the maid where she handed Tea a glass of wine. Just then a loud bang was heard as the cook rang the gong to announce that it in fact was 7 oclock and dinner was ready. The bang startled the guests, and caused Joey to spill his glass of wine all over Tea.

"Sorry, I'm a little accident proned," he said as he pulled out his hankie to dry off Mrs. Peacock.

So all the "suspects" have been introduced. I hope to get the next chapter up quickly if I get good response from this one. Thoughts? Please review to keep me going!


	2. Then Who is Our Host?

Kuriso- Holy crap….I didn't expect to get so many responses so quickly…and good responses at that. I'm happy ^___^ Let me respond to a few reviews real quickly…

Journey maker: Aww you are always so sweet to me! My first loyal reader *blush* I'm so glad you like it. I just hope it will live up to your standards.

Dark Necrofear: I shall keep going as long as I keep getting encouragements such as yours ^___^

Sairento Majishan: I feel so special you made this exception for me. I promise you won't regret it…at least I like to think so.

Yami's Aibou: You won't have to wait too long to read the next chapter! ^___^ Enjoy!

Ivory Goddess of Ebony Heart: Thank you so much! Of course I wanted to write MOAR! I'm having so much fun with this story. As for the grammar errors and spelling, that is what I get for not reading through my own work and expecting spell check to know what I want. Woop *nervous chuckle* ^_^" I normally am not that bad. (I can't believe I overlooked Colonel. That was bad even for me)

Seto- You know Kuriso you wouldn't have that problem with grammar if you actually read through your chapter rather than skimming….

Kuriso- Hey Seto….*throws shoe* jerk -_-" As per usual, I do not own Clue or Yu-Gi-Oh!

Pegasus escorted the guests into the dinner room where Yvette was waiting. The dining room was a large room decorated in antique furniture like the rest of the house. The walls were covered in faded purple wallpaper that looked as though it was once respectable. The table was oversized and oblong, continuing with the antique theme of the rest of the house. Set at the table were 7 place settings each with a card sitting in the soup bowl. Each card had a different name written on it.

"There are names written at your setting. Do sit accordingly," Pegasus pointed out.

"Will you be joining us?" asked Kaiba.

"No, as I said Kaiba-boy I am here merely helping a dear friend."

"Then is that seat for our host," said Mai as she pointed to the last seat at the head of the table.

"No my dear. That seat is for Mr. Body," said Pegasus.

"But, I thought Mr. Body was our host," Tea said with surprise. Everyone agreed while looking around in a state of panic. Pegasus gave a light chuckle and walked out of the room into the kitchen. Yvette began filling the bowls in front of the guests with soup.

"Well I am going to begin eating while the food is still hot," stated Yami.

"Oh, well shouldn't we wait for our last guest. It would be rude otherwise," said Tea.

"I will keep something warm for him," said Yvette as she poured soup into Mai's bowl leaning over just so that her large cleavage was at eye level with Mai.

"What did you have in mind?" Mai asked sarcastically. Yvette gave a cold glare to Mai that told her she was not humored by the remark. Everyone seemed to be in agreement to start eating while the food was hot. Yami picked up his spoon and proceeded to take a loud slurp. As he put his spoon down back in the soup, Ishizu had put her spoon to her mouth and gave an equally loud slurp. The two continued back in forth filling silence with loud slurps of soup. The other guests stared with their spoons at their mouths but in too much of a state of disgust to allow the spoons to enter their mouths.

"Well someone should get the ball rolling and it might as well be me. I mean I'm used to these kinds of situations with my husband's work I have to play hostess all the time so I have no problem starting up the conversation to break the ice. I mean I have absolutely no idea what we are doing here or what I am doing here for that matter but I am determined to enjoy myself and oh my yes this soup is delicious…." Tea said in one breath. The rest of the guests stopped eating and stared at her in aw.

"You say you are used to these sort of things because of you're husband's work?" Joey asked inquisitively.

"Oh yes. It is an intricate part of life when you are the wife of a Senator."

"So you are married to Senator Peacock?" asked Ishizu.

"No, Senator Pigeon," remarked Kaiba.

"Ha! Ha! You are so funny Kaiba. How I have missed that wit of yours," she said sarcastically.

"So what is your company doing now Kaiba?" Kaiba just glared at her. "Oh come on. How are we going to catch up with each other if no one will say anything?" Tea asked optimistically.

"Maybe he doesn't want to catch up with you." Mai said coldly.

"Well I am sure I don't know but if I wasn't trying to keep the conversation going we'd all be sitting here in unbearable silence," said Tea in her attempt to defend herself.

"Are you afraid of silence Mrs. Peacock?" ask Yami.

"What? Yes…wait…no."

"Well it seems you suffer from what we call 'Pressure of Speech,'" he explained.

"We?" interrupted Mai. "Who's we? You a shrink now?"

"I do have a PHD in psychiatry yes. But I don't practice."

"Practice makes perfect Yami. I think more men need a little practice. Don't you agree Tea?" Tea looked up with a shocked and confused look. She had forgotten about Mai's ability of being crash but subtly, but because she was put on the spot, she could not think of a proper way to respond without stooping to her level. Pegasus entered from the kitchen holding 2 plates while Yvette followed behind with the rest. As he placed one in front of Tea, her eyes lit up as she realized what was in front of her. She picked up her fork quickly not waiting for the others to be served and began eating the creamy unknown food in front of her as though it were her last meal.

"Mmmm," she exclaimed. "This is one of my favorite recipes!"

"I know dear," Pegasus said with a sly smile as he finished setting the plates and walking out of the room once more.

"So then what do you do?" Kaiba now asked deciding to join in on the conversation seeing as how it was geared towards attacking his rival.

"I work for the United Nations," replied Yami

"Hmph…another politician," said Kaiba.

"No, I work for a branch of U.N.O. The World Health Organization. W.H.O." seeming satisfied with the answer, Kaiba returned to playing with the mystery food with his fork.

"So Ishizu. You're last name is White now. Who is your husband?" asked Joey.

"You don't know him!" she responded quickly.

"Well…um. What does he do?"

"NOTHING!"

"Nothing?" questioned Mai.

"No, not really…just…lying on his back…all day."

"Sounds like hard work to me," said Mai.

"Well what did he do?" asked Tea.

"He was a nuclear physicist."

"A rocket scientist?" asked Joey.

"In a way." Wanting to steer the conversation off of her, she turned the questioning to Mai. "What do you do?"

"I own a small business in Washington DC."

"What kind of business?" asked Yami.

"Services."

"Of what sort?" asked Joey.

"Of the serving sort."

"So wait, Yami works for the UN. Mai lives in Washington DC. Tea is married to Senator Peacock. Ishizu's husband was a nuclear physicist. My corporation used to make military weapons. And Joey works for the IRS," Kaiba said after a sudden realization.

"Wait, how did you know what Joey did? He hadn't mentioned it yet?"

"The mutt and I discussed it in the library before you arrived," said Kaiba. "Unlike you, we came on time."

"Coming when you need to is a good habit to have," remarked Mai with a smirk.

"Must everything that comes out of you be about sex?" asked Tea.

"I just made a remark. It is not my fault your mind happens to be in where it shouldn't be."

"My point being…" Kaiba again interrupted, "is that we all have some sort of involvement with the government, or at least had at one point."

"Not me," corrected Mai.

"Yes, but you live in Washington. That's a government town. We all have or are making a living off of the government," said Yami. As he said this Pegasus walked in from the kitchen.

"Listen Pegasus! I demand you tell us what is going on!" exclaimed Joey as he stood up in a failed attempt to intimidate Pegasus. Before Pegasus had the chance to speak, the doorbell rang again. He walked out of the room heading for the front door. In the distance, the guests could hear the conversation.

"Oh good! Mr. Body, so nice for you to join us."

"Pegasus, what is the meaning of this?"

"Talk of that will be later. Do come this way if you please." The two walked through the door of the dining room. Mr. Body was an average sized gentleman; about 5' 9" in height with a thin frame. What caught the guest's attention was the striking facial features. He had a strong jaw line, almond shaped eyes, with jet black hair slicked back close to his head. Across his left cheek was a scar that looked to be from a large knife.

"What are they all doing here?" he asked.

"Having dinner." Pegasus said with a smile. He showed Mr. Body to his seat. He sat down and slouched eyeing his "unexpected guests". Yvette walked in with the soup she had saved for him. Before she had a chance to set it in front of him he stopped her. "Nah, take it away baby. I already ate." As he was saying this, his hand traced the back of her thigh and headed up under her skirt causing her to flinch and take a step back. This tension was all that Tea could handle.

"Look!" she said as she slammed her hand down on the table. "I want to know why we have all been dragged up to this horrible place."

"Well," Pegasus began. "I received a letter a few days back that stated 'It would be in your best interest to be present on this date for a Mr. Body will be bringing to an end a long and painful financial burden.'"

"So did I," grunted Kaiba.

"Me too," they all chimed in.

"I too received a letter," stated Mr. Body.

"Did you? May I ask did it also say the same things as ours?"

Mr. Body looked up at Pegasus who was standing above him smiling down on him waiting for his answer. "No…"

"I see," Pegasus said as he brushed his long grey hair back behind his ear. "In that case, can I offer you fruit or dessert?" Everyone turned away having lost all appetite anyone may have had. "In that case, I believe we should head to the study, where I believe our unknown host will reveal himself…"

Sorry gotta leave ya on a cliff hanger. It's always the best way to go. Please R/R to keep me going and tell me if I am heading the right way. Most of it is from the movie but I am changing things here and there to make it fit more with how I want the "events of the evening" to go later on. I hope I haven't lost anyone yet…


	3. Secrets

Kuriso- I'm not going to lie, I'm kinda bummed the last chapter only got 1 review. It was a good review yes but still, I do like hearing feedback. It keeps me wanting to continue. But this chapter is dedicated to Yami's Aibou for being the only person to review and say wonderful things about it. I hope this chapter is long enough for you this time. Love ya all!

One by one all the guests stood up from their seats and began to exit the grand dining room. They followed Pegasus into the study who instructed them to take a seat while he headed to the front of the room. There sat a large antique desk with a large leather chair behind it. Sitting on top of the desk was a manila envelope with a note that read "Open after dinner." Everyone adjusted themselves getting comfortable on the assorted chairs and sofas around the room. In the back of the room in the corner near the door, Mr. Body took a seat in a large gold chair as he eyed the people sitting in the room.

Yvette walked around with a tray of Champagne and brandy that she offered to everyone. Mai pulled out a cigarette from a case she kept in her breast, then turning to look at Yami who had taken a seat next to her.

"Got a light?" she asked. He pulled out an old fashion lighter. It was a deep purple matching his suit and on the sides had carved the image of the Dark Magician. "So, Professor Plum, is all the purple because of your love of the Dark Magician?"

"Partly," he replied.

"What's the other part?" she asked with a seductive smile.

"Something that need not concern you," he said. Dissatisfied with the answer, she turned away taking a drag of her cigarette and blowing the smoke in the face of Kaiba who sat on the other side of her. Fanning the smoke away with his hand, he was about to say something when Pegasus interrupted him.

"Everyone here was invited because you all have one thing in common…" Pegasus began.

"Yah we are all duelists and we were all stupid enough to come here," Kaiba remarked sarcastically.

"As I was saying, you all have one thing in common…and that is…unless of course, would you like to tell?" he asked as he looked over to Mr. Body.

"Why? Do they know who I am?" Mr. Body asked.

"I don't believe so. You haven't formally introduced yourself," said Pegasus. Getting up from his seat, Mr. Body headed for the exit of the room in a fury.

"This is all a hoax! I suggest we all leave now!" Mr. Body said turning back to the guests before walking out of the room and heading for the front door. Pegasus followed him out of the room.

"You can't get out that way!" he informed Mr. Body. "All the doors are locked and all the windows are barred.

"You can't keep us in here!" Mr. Body shouted! All of the guests realizing what was taking place exited as well standing at the entrance of the room and began agreeing with Mr. Body.

"What is going on here Pegasus?" exclaimed Yami.

"You sleazy slimball! What do you have planned!?" demanded Joey.

"If this is another one of you're tricks Pegasus…" started Kaiba.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, please listen to me. Everything is fine. Please return to the study. Everything will be explained. That means you too Mr. Body. Mr. Body get back here!" shouted Pegasus. Mr. Body ran past Pegasus down the hall and entered the indoor patio. It room was surrounded on all four sides by large windows. From the windows a flash of lightening brightened the room and thunder rumbled the potted plants that covered the room. Rain was coming down now in buckets making the view almost impossible to see. Mr. Body looked around till he spotted a large brick on the ground. Bending down to pick it down, Pegasus finally caught up. Catching his breath and standing at the doorway, he took in a deep breath and brushed his long grey hair back. He smiled and looked at Mr. Body who now had the brick in his hand and pulled back preparing to throw it at the windows.

"You can't get out that way," pointed out Pegasus.

"Why not? It's only glass," said Mr. Body. Just as he said it, as though timed and planned a flash of lightening lit up the room again as 3 large dogs jumped against the windows standing on their hind legs, they bared their teeth and barked with anger in their eyes ready to rip someone apart. Looking over at Pegasus in defeat, who proceeded to cross his arms and smile smugly; Mr. Body lowered his arms and dropped the brick. Letting out a deep sigh, he walked out of the patio and back into the main hallway where the rest of the guests were waiting to see what will happen. Following Pegasus back into the study again, everyone adjusted themselves once more while Mr. Body sat in the back pouting. Pegasus walked back over to the desk picking up the manila folder, he ripped the top off and pulled the files and photographs out. Glancing over the notes, he looked back at the guests who sat with their hearts racing as they waited in anticipation for the news to why they were all reunited in the godforsaken mansion on top of the hill.

"Everyone is here because you all have something in common. You are all being blackmailed. For some considerable time, all of you have been paying what you can afford and in some cases more than you can afford to someone who threatens to expose you. And none of you know who is blackmailing you. Do you?" asked Pegasus looking around at the shocked expressions on everyone's face.

"Oh please! No one could blackmail me! My life is an open book. I've never done anything wrong," said Tea as she nervously took a drink of her Champagne.

"Anyone else wish to deny it?" asked Pegasus. Everyone avoided eye contact with him as they looked down shamefully. "Good then as we are all in the same boat, there is no harm in my revealing some details. And my instructions are to do so. Thank you Yvette." He looked over at the maid standing on the other side of the door. She nodded and walked out of the room and closed the door behind her to give the other guests privacy.

"Don't you think you might spare us this humiliation?" pleaded Ishizu.

"I'm sorry." Pegasus said with a genuine look of sympathy. Composing himself again, he cleared his throat, looked down at his notes and walked over to Yami who was now leaning against the fire place. "Yami-boy, since you are the king of games, why don't we begin this little one with you. You were once a Professor of psychiatry specializing in helping paranoid and homicidal lunatics suffering from delusions of grandeur."

"Yes, that's right, but now I work for the United Nations," he said curious to where Pegasus was going with this.

"So your work has not changed. But you don't practice medicine at the UN. His license to practice medicine has been lifted. Correct?" asked Pegasus as everyone gave a small gasp.

"Why, what did he do?" asked Mai who stood up from the couch and walked over to Pegasus and leaned against the desk.

"You know that thing you are not allowed to do with minors?" Pegasus asked.

"Yea," said Mai.

"Well he did!"

"HA! Wait don't tell me it was..." started Mai

"Yugi," said Kaiba.

"I didn't know he was still 17 at the time. We are in love." Yami said trying to defend himself.

"I never would have guessed," said Ishizu.

"Really, it wasn't obvious to anyone else?" asked Kaiba.

"So that's the other reason for the purple, to match Yugi's eyes. How sweet, someone gag me," said Mai.

"Oh how disgusting," said Tea. "Homosexuality is bad enough, but with a child."

"Are you passing moral judgment Mrs. Tea Peacock?" Pegasus turned and swooped down sitting next to Tea on the couch getting uncomfortably close to her and smiling. "How then do you justify taking bribes, in exchange for delivering your husband Senator Peacock's vote to certain lobbyists?"

"My husband is a paid consultant! There is nothing wrong with that!" she snapped back.

"Not if publicly declared perhaps. But if the payment is delivered by slipping used greenbacks in plain envelopes under the door of the men's room from known members of the mob, how then do you describe that transaction?" said Pegasus feeling he has her cornered.

"I'd say it stinks," said Mai as she swooped from behind the couch to lean over and smile at Tea.

"Oh how would you know? When were you in that men's room?" snarled Tea.

"So it's true!" said Yami.

"No! It's a vicious lie!" shout Tea as she stood up about to break down in tears. Looking around, she sat back down.

"I'm sure we are all glad to hear that…but you have been paying the blackmailer for over two years now to keep that story out of the papers." Having heard enough, Tea got back up and turned away from Pegasus.

"Well I am willing to believe you Tea. I too and being blackmailed for something I didn't do," admitted Ishizu as she returned the black veil on her hat back over her face as though she was beginning to mourn.

"Me too," said Joey.

"And me," said Kaiba.

"Not me!" said Mai.

"You're not being blackmailed?" asked Pegasus with a puzzled look.

"Oh no I'm being black mailed alright. But I did what I'm being blackmailed for." Mai said as she walked back over to the desk this time sitting on top.

"What did you do?" asked Yami.

"Well, to be perfectly frank, I run a specialized hotel and telephone service which provide gentlemen with the company of a young lady for a short while. It's called _the Harpie Ladies_…"

"Predictable," snorted Kaiba.

"If we are going to discuss predictable," Pegasus said as he walked over to Kaiba "then let's talk about you. You're company, when run by your step father, created military weapons. Because you believed that gaming was the new wave, you shut down all military contracts as well as research. Since then, profits have seemingly tripled. Here's the odd part. Your company's profits have gone up, therefore so has your salary compared to that of your father's. Yet, you have not had to pay a single read cent in taxes. How is that? Probably because of a certain mistress of yours who knows their way around to hide money in order to avoid paying taxes on them."

"Don't you dare call him my mistress!" Kaiba growled standing up in an attempt to intimidate Pegasus.

"Wait wait wait! Him? You have a male lover?" asked Ishizu.

"What is everyone fucking queer?" mumbled Tea.

"Wait a minute. Kaiba, how did you know what Joey did? Before at dinner you were able to announce that Joey worked for the IRS. Is he your lover?" asked Yami.

"Certainly not!" exclaimed Joey who now has also stood up from his seat to intercept Yami as he walked towards Kaiba.

"I wasn't asking you. I was asking Kaiba!"

"Well tell him it's not true," Joey said looking at Kaiba.

"It's not true," said Kaiba.

"Is that true?" asked Mai.

"No it's not true," said Kaiba.

"AHA! A double negative!" shout Pegasus who was now standing next to Joey and Kaiba!

"Double negative? You mean you still have the….photographs?" whispered Joey to Kaiba.

"That sounded like a confession to me! In fact the double negative has lead to proof positive. I'm afraid you gave yourself away!" Pegasus said holding up the explicit negatives of Joey and Kaiba together.

"Are you trying to make me look stupid in front of the other guests?" Joey shouted trying to get in Pegasus's face.

"You don't need any help from me," Pegasus said calmly.

"That's right!" Joey said triumphantly, before he slowly realized what he had just said.

"But seriously. So Joey and Kaiba are lovers. I don't see what's wrong with that," said Yami.

"Look who's talking, cradle robber," snapped Mai.

"But Kaiba is sleeping with one of the heads of the IRS. It looks shady to the government if their affair became public. And both their positions are sensitive. Of course we all can't forget tax evasion is still a crime. Al Capone was never charged for all of his murders and robberies, rather for taxes. And if Kaiba goes to jail, he loses his company." Pegasus said matter-of-factly. "Now then, Mrs. White, you have been paying our friend the blackmailer ever since your husband died under, shall we say mysterious circumstances.

"HA!" laughed Mai.

"What's so funny?" asked Ishizu.

"I see; that's why he's lying on his back all day. In his coffin," she said with another laugh.

"I didn't kill him."

"Then why are you paying the blackmailer?" asked Joey.

"I don't want a scandal, do I? We had had a very humiliating public confrontation. He was deranged…lunatic. He didn't actually seem to like me very much. He had threatened to kill me in public," Ishizu explained.

"Why would he want to kill you in public?" asked Mai.

"I think she meant he threatened, in public, to kill her," Pegasus explained to her.

"Oh…was that his final word on the matter?" Mai asked as she took a puff of her second cigarette.

"Being killed is pretty final, wouldn't you say?" Ishizu asked Mai.

"Yet he was the one who died, not you Ishizu. Not you!" Pegasus said with a suspicious tone.

"What was he like?" asked Mai.

"He was always a rather stupidly optimistic man. I mean, I'm afraid it came as a great shock to him when he died. But he was found dead at home. His head had been cut off and so had his….you know…" Ishizu said pointing down to her privates. All the men sitting crossed their legs as they sympathized and felt pain in their groins. "I had been out all evening at the movies."

"Do you miss him?" Mai asked.

"Well, it's a matter of life after death. Now that he's dead, I have a life."

"But he was your second husband," Pegasus pointed out. "Your first husband also disappeared."

"But that was his job, he was an illusionist."

"But he never reappeared." Pegasus said looking at her with a confused look.

"Well, he wasn't a very good illusionist."

"So this just leaves Mr. Body then," said Tea.

"What's your little secret?" Maid looked over at Mr. Body who hadn't said a word through the whole thing and barely had moved. His black eyes looked right at Mai who was trying to be seductive, but Mr. Body seemed unfazed by it. Mai took another puff of her cigarette before crossing her legs on the desk and leaned forward anxious to hear what his secret could possibly be.

"His secret? Haven't you all figured it out yet?" asked Pegasus. "He's the one blackmailing you all."

Kuriso- DUN DUN DUN!!!!!!!! *insert dramatic music* So that's why they are all there and that is who Mr. Body is. Hope you enjoyed this chapter. The next one is going to be to _die _for…read and review!


	4. I Didn't Do It!

Kuriso- *peeking out from a corner* ok I know I haven't updated this in a while but please don't hate me. *gets shoe to the face* KAIBA!!

Seto- What? I didn't do it.

Kuriso- -_-" stupid rich boy… Anyways, real quick reviewer responses…

Yami's Aibou- Yup, your own chapter ahaha. Love you too darling. Hope this stays up with your standards.

SRRH- It is like the movie so far…and there will still be a lot following the movie, but I changed what they were being blackmailed for for a reason (did that sentence make sense?). So you will just have to see who done it! (and remember the movie had 3 endings).

Ivory Goddess of Ebony Heart- Yeah you either like or hate that pairing. I happen to like it. But thanks for reading despite not liking them. OMG that is one of my favorite lines in the movie. PRICELESS!

And without any further ado, let us continue….I still don't own Yu-Gi-Oh! Or Clue…still wish I did though.

"You bastard!" Joey shouted as he leapt towards Mr. Body. "Put up your dukes! Come on!" Joey lifted his hands in the ready position preparing to have an all out brawl with Mr. Body. While he was doing that, the rest of the guests also decided to confront Mr. Body in their own ways. Tea screaming bloody murder while Yami scolded him. Seto tried to pry Joey away from the fight but he was too late. Mr. Body stomped on Joeys foot making him howl in pain. While he was distracted by that, he poked Joey in the eyes.

"If you aren't going to fight fair, don't fight at all," demanded Joey who was still in pain as Mr. Body still calmly continued to walk towards Pegasus. He was stopped by Ishizu who placed her hands on his cheeks leaning in for a kiss, stopping short and kneeing him in his crotch. Mr. Body fell to the floor gasping in pain as Tea congratulated Ishizu on her attack. Pegasus having enough of the commotion decided he needed to regain control of the situation.

"Ladies and gentlemen, please," he begged everyone who was still shouting too loudly to hear his pleads. Mr. Body stood back up as Pegasus shouted "The police will be here!"

"What?!" they all screamed.

"Listen, blackmail depends on secrecy. You all admitted how he has been able to blackmail you. The police will be here in 45 minutes. Tell them the truth, Mr. Body will go to jail and your troubles will be over!"

"It's not that easy," interrupted Mr. Body. "They won't go to the police. If they were they would have already."

"Then I will," stated Pegasus. "I have the evidence and this conversation is being tape recorded."

"Tape recordings will never hold up in courts. And since when have you ever cared about doing the noble thing, Pegasus?" inquired Kaiba. Mr. Body stood up walking to the door where Pegasus was now standing.

"And where do you think you are going?" demanded Pegasus.

"I think I have a way to make up their minds. Care if I get my little bag from the hallway?" smiled Mr. Body as he exited into the hallway. There he picked up 6 black boxes each tied with a black bow and returned to the study. "Does anyone know what are in these?" Mr. Body asked everyone.

"The evidence against us no doubt," snapped Ishizu. Mr. Body only laughed as he looked at her.

"We didn't know we were seeing you. Did you know you were meeting us?" asked Mai as she now walked closer to Mr. Body.

"Oh yes. It was all in my note."

"And what did it say?" asked Yami.

"Just that you all wanted to discuss our financial arrangements. And if I did not show, Pegasus old boy would be going to the police. Naturally I had to make an appearance." Mr. Body walked to all six of the guests handing each one a box. "Open them," he invited. Everyone looked down at their packages with looks of discontent. Finally Mai stood up.

"Why not. I love getting gifts from _strange_ men," quipped Mai sarcastically. The rest of the guests started to open their presents, though much slower than Mai. She ripped the lace bow off, opening the box and removing the tissue to discover a large heavy metal candle stick. It was brushed steel and painted gold. "A candle stick? What's this for?"

Tea opened her box finding a 6 inch dagger. She picked it up looking curiously at it. Ishizu unwrapped and large thick rope tied into a noose. Joey lifted a rather large wrench, before looking over nervously at Yami who held a revolver. Finally Kaiba opened his and picked up a lead pipe. He raised and eyebrow, looking over at Joey before looking back at Mr. Body.

"In your hands, you each hold a deadly weapon. If you go to the police, you will be humiliated publicly. I will see to that in court. But, if you kill Pegasus now, no one but the 7 of us will ever know." Mr. Body smirked as he looked over to Pegasus whose eyes now widened. For the first time in the evening it looked like he had lost control and was now in grave danger. "He has the key to the front door, which he said he would only give to us over his dead body. I say we take him up on that offer."

Pegasus backed up into the desk behind him while the guests looked over at him. Mr. Body walked to the light switch at the front of the room. "The only way out of here is for one of you to kill Pegasus….now!" He flipped the switch causing the room to go pitch black. There was a loud thump, a gasp for air then the gun fired causing Tea to scream in horror. Another loud bang was heard before Tea finally found the lightswitch. She turned it back on, then turned around and screamed in horror seeing that it was not Pegasus lying on the ground but Mr. Body. She dropped her knife and fell back.

"Oh my God! It's Mr. Body," screeched Ishizu. Yami ran over to him kneeling next to him. The rest of the guests gathered around.

"Stand back. Give him some air!" he shouted. He turned him over and checked his pulse. "He's dead."

"Who had the gun?" asked Tea.

"I did," answered Yami.

"Then you killed him," she accused.

"I didn't!" defended Yami. "Look, no bullet wounds. Look!" Yami shouted pointing to the wall. On the wall next to the mirror was a clear bullet hole. "Someone tried to grab the gun out of my hand in the dark and it went off."

"Then how did he die!" shouted Joey.

"I don't know! I am not a forensics expert!" growled Yami.

"Well someone had to kill him. And it could be any of you. You all had a motive," snapped Kaiba.

"Any of us? What about you," accused Ishizu.

"Well I didn't do it!" stated Kaiba.

"It could have been any of us. We all had a motive," noted Mai.

"Oh I need a drink," sighed Tea as she headed over to the brandy. She lifted the glass and took a large swig. Yami looked over and shouted.

"Maybe he was poisoned!" pointed to the brandy. Tea dropped her glass in horror and began screaming at the top of her lungs. Kaiba grabbed her arm leading her to a chair trying to calm her down but she continued screaming. He sat her down trying to reason with her before he finally slapped her across the face instantly shutting her up. The rest of the guests stopped and stared.

"I had to stop the screaming…" defended Seto.

"Well, was the brandy poisoned or not?" inquired Joey. He walked over to the glass laying empty on the floor. "Guess we'll never know."

"Unless…unless she dies too," said Kaiba as he looks over at Tea who is now holding her head dizzy and confused. Everyone runs towards her surrounding her waiting to see if she dies as well. She looks at the people invading her space but before she could say anything, she is interrupted by a loud scream coming from the billiard room. They all picked up their heads and dashed towards the shriek to find the door locked. They bang on it surprised to find Yvette answer it with tears streaming down her face. Behind her set upon the pool table was the tape recorder Pegasus had mentioned earlier that was recording their conversation.

"What!? What is it!?" everyone began screaming at Yvette which only made her more frazzled.

"You locked me in here with the murderer you idiots!" screamed Yvette.

"The murderer is in here?" asked Kaiba rather shocked.

"Oui monsieur,"

"Where?" demanded Joey.

"Right here!" she answered. Yami took a peak behind a curtain expecting to see someone. "I am looking at him. Or her. It is like Mai said, it could be any of you."

"How did you know she said that?" inquired Ishizu.

"I was listening!" Yvette pointed at the tape recorder. Mai sighed in a way that was a combination of sympathy and irritability. She walked over to Yvette who was trying to hold back her tears.

"Come with us to the study," ordered Mai.

"With the murderer?" cried Yvette.

"There is safety in numbers…" Joey said waving the wrench at her face making Yvette uneasy. He realized this and put it behind him "…my dear." Yvette sniveled and walked with the rest of them as they left the billiard room and returned to the study.

"Pegasus, I ain't in any mood for any more of your games," Joey accused.

"My games?!" said Pegasus shocked.

"Is there ay indication to how he died?" asked Kaiba looking down at Mr. Body.

"Not a one," sighed Yami.

"This isn't what I intended at all," cried Pegasus.

"What you intended?" Mai questioned with a raised eyebrow.

"Pegasus, what's going on? Why would Mr. Body invite us all to his house then show up late?" demanded Yami. "And if you tell me you don't know I swear I will rip out that other eye."

"I invited you. It was all my idea," admitted Pegasus.

"Wait, why would you invite us to a stranger's house? Were you assisting him in blackmailing," berated Ishizu.

"Certainly not. Do you think I don't have enough of my own money?" pointed out Pegasus.

"This has your name written all over it," glared Kaiba.

"Please sit down and let me explain," Pegasus gestured to the couches and chairs. Everyone took their seats expect Kaiba who walked over to a table and leaned against it.

"Let me begin by admitting that Mr. Body was an associate of mine. But it was not his untimely death this evening that brought his employment at Industrial Illusions to an end. I fired him after learning he was stealing secrets. He would hire employees of mine to steal secrets from my company and sell them. That is how he made his fortunes was with my idea. So I fired him as soon as Duelist Kingdom had ended and I returned to my right state of mind…"

"That's debatable," interrupted Joey.

"…he didn't feel what he was doing was wrong, because he believed I was a….Communist," everyone let out a gasp except for Kaiba who rolled his eyes. "He felt he was doing it for Capitalism, therefore justifying his actions. I, as Kaiba will point out, am far from a Communist, and immediately fired him. As an act of revenge he learned of my secrets, my plot for Kaiba Corp takeover, the mysterious death of my wife, a secret gay relation while I was married…"

"I knew that idiotic Toon World card with the rainbows was a sign for something," snorted Kaiba. As he finished his snide remark, the table he leaned on broke causing him to take a tumble.

"You so deserved that," said Yami.

"…anyways. He threatened to go to the media and ruin me and my company. I couldn't let that happen. So I did snooping of my own, and learned of his blackmails on all of you. So I decided to help all of you and myself, we would come together, confront him, and turn him over to the police."

"While exposing yourself and all of us," said Ishizu.

"It wasn't supposed to be like that at all. To make a long story short…"

"Too late," said Joey.

"I vowed to do everything in my power to protect you, myself and take him down."

"Why would you protect us?" asked Yami.

"Dear Yami-boy. After everything we've been through, why wouldn't I?"

"I still hate you," glared Kaiba.

"Well, everything is explained…"said Yami.

"Nothing is explained you idiot. We still don't know who killed him…dumbass," insulted Mai.

"And we only have 35 minutes to do so before the police arrive,"

"Dear God, we can't have them come now!" cried Tea.

"How the hell are we supposed to figure out which one of you did it?" questioned Kaiba.

"What do you mean which of "you" did it?" Yami shouted.

"Well I didn't do it?" defended Kaiba.

"Well, one of us did. We all had the opportunity, we all had a motive!" panicked Pegasus.

"Great, we'll all go to the chair!" mocked Mai.

"Maybe it wasn't one of us," suggested Yami.

"Well who else could it have been?" asked Joey.

"Only the cook," said Pegasus and Yvette.

"THE COOK!" they all screamed. The guests all dashed out of the study and ran down the hall to the kitchen. Upon entering the kitchen, there was no one standing in there. Seto walked over to the refrigerator standing in front and looked around.

"Well, where is she?" he asked. As he did the refrigerator door opened slowly. Inside stood the cook. Mai let out a howl in fright when the cook fell forward into Kaiba's arms. He caught her and noticed a knife sticking in her back. She lied dead in his arms as he struggled to hold her large body.

"I DIDN'T DO IT!" shouted Kaiba. He began sliding to the ground unable to hold her much longer. "A little help here?"

Kuriso- Mr. Body is dead…The cook is dead…now what? Who could have done it? Was it one of them or is someone else in the house? Why would I know?

Seto- Cause you are writing the story.

Kuriso- Will you shut up negative Nancy! Please R/R


	5. No Body?

Kuriso- Hello to anyone still reading. I sincerely apologize for the lateness of this chapter, but I have been severely unmotivated. This is just a real quick short update to show that I haven't forgotten and plan on updating. Hopefully by tonight I will have a longer chapter update. Anyways enough from me.

A few of the guests run towards Kaiba who was sliding further and further down holding up the larger cook. The help lift her off him laying her face down. Mai reaches for the knife in the back but is stopped by Joey.

"Don't touch it! That's evidence!"

"Not to us. We have to find out who did this. We can't take fingerprints," she reasoned.

"Pegasus! I've had just about enough of dis. Explain!"

"Me? Why me? What did I do?"

"Who would want to kill the cook?" questioned Kaiba looking down at the knife in her back.

"Dinner wasn't that bad…" joked Mai.

"How can you joke at a time like dis Mai?" Joey grew increasingly more frustrated.

"It's my defense mechanism."

"Some defense! If I was da killer I'd kill you next for dat remark!" Everyone stood up immediately looking at Joey in a suspicious manner. Joey, realizing what he had just said tried to defend himself. "I said if…IF! Oh please there is only one admitted killer here and it is not me! It's her!" pointing to Ishizu.

"Me!? I've admitted nothing…" Ishizu said in shock. Joey walked towards her in an attempt to intimidate her. Towering over her, he began his questioning.

"You paid the blackmailer. How many husbands have ya had?"

"Mine or others?"

"Yours."

"Just five…"

"FIVE?"

"Yes, husbands should be like tissues. Soft, strong and disposable."

"You lure men to their death like spiders with flies!"

"Flies are where men are most vulnerable!"

"Right!" Joey said feeling justified. Then realizing what he had said, he quickly changed the subject. "Well if it wasn't you then who was it? Who had the knife anyways?" He asked himself. His eyes again widened as he realized turning towards Tea who was still standing in the doorway. "It was YOU! Tea…admit it! You're friendship speeches can't get ya out of dis one!"

"Yes, but I put it down!"

"Where?" Yami asked now joining in the suspicion.

"In the study…"

"When!?" raising his voice.

"I don't know! Before I fainted, after I fainted. I don't know! But anyone of you could have picked it up!" Tea screamed at the point of tears.

"Well then, if we are all done accusing everyone of murder, I think we should take the body into the study," announced Pegasus.

"Why?" asked Joey

"Because, less mess. I like things neat."

The guests rolled their eyes as Pegasus, Kaiba, Yami and Joey each took a limb of the cook's corpse and carried her back down the hall. They walked into the study, the women falling behind.

"LOOK!" Yami exclaimed pointing towards the ground, letting go of the cooks right arm causing her to fall face first on the ground.

"What?" Pegasus and Joey asked in unison.

"The body is gone!" Yami stated.

"What are you looking at?" Tea questioned in the back.

"Nothing…" Yami answered.

"Then who are you looking at?" Mai asked.

"Nobody…there is no body! That's what we mean. Mr. Body's body. It's gone!" Pegasus explained to them.

"Well maybe he wasn't dead?" piped in Ishizu.

"I checked!" Yami said.

"We should have made sure!" scolded Mai.

"How? By cutting off his head I supposed," scoffed Tea.

"That wasn't called for!" chastised Ishizu.

"Oh ya this coming from the family of killers. First Malik now you!"

"You son of a…"

"Well where is he now?" interrupted Mai.

"We better look for him," decided Yami.

Frantically, the guests began searching the room to see if they could find the missing "Body".

"Well he couldn't have been dead. People don't come with Monster Reborn cards to bring them back," stated Kaiba.

"Of course he was dead…at least I thought he was…Well what difference does it make now?" Yami tried to play it off.

"Makes a great deal of difference to him. Maybe he did have a Call of the Haunted. Or maybe there is life after death…" Mai joked.

"Life after death is as improbable as sex after marriage."

"Stranger things have happened. Like 5,000 year old Pharaoh's living in puzzles and raping children."

"Shove it Mai. And my soul was trapped with magic. Not hit over the head."

Ignore the scuffle going Kaiba tried to think of a logical answer for the dead cook and missing Body. "Maybe," he started "Maybe Mr. Body killed the cook!"

"Yes!" Mai and Ishizu shouted.

"How?" Pegasus asked doubtfully.

Kaiba stood at a loss, not having an answer for the mechanics.

"Well…if you excuse me. I have to…um…" started Tea. Leaning to Yvette and lowing her voice. "Is there a ladies room?"

"Oui Oui Madame," answered Yvette pointing down the hall.

"No, I just need to powder my nose," Tea walked out of the room.

Kuriso- I know it's short. A long one is coming soon. I just typed this fast as I sat in class feeling bad for not updating. Think of it as a teaser lol. Long chapter up next. More murder, more bad puns! More of Joey's bad accent!


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